Dicussing Mental Health
Our children are important to us and as our children navigate through their teenager years, they face new challenges. As parents, we try our best to guide them by discussing difficult topics such as pubertal changes, friendships, and planning out their future paths. But is there something important that we may have missed?
Mental health is important!
Mental health issues are more common than we think, and the effects of experiencing one can be harrowing.
1 in 5 teenagers between ages 12 and 18 suffer from at least 1 diagnosable mental health disorder.
Half of all mental health issues start by the time a child reaches the age of 14 and many tend to go unaddressed.
Some may consider resorting to self-harm or suicide to “solve” their pain: suicide remains the leading cause of death among those aged 10 to 29.
When should it be discussed?
Have you noticed any changes in your teen’s behaviour lately – something that is out of their ‘norm’ or is it part of their teenage years? Deciding when to raise your concerns with your teen can be difficult or even uncomfortable, but it is an important step of understanding their mental health challenges. Parental instincts are one of your best guides – trust them and have a conversation with your teen to find out how they are doing.
If you notice these potential warning signs going on for an extended period (a week or so), it would be worth addressing them and seeking professional support:
Sudden weight loss or weight gain.
Insomnia or sleeping extensively.
Loss of interest in daily activities or previous interests.
Irritability and agitation.
Drastic changes in mood, behaviour, or personality.
Avoiding school or certain areas.
8 tips for discussing mental health:
Show your concern and ask open-ended questions.
“I noticed that you seem troubled. Would you like to share what you’re going through?”
Be gentle, curious, and non-judgemental.
“Could you please help me understand why you feel this way?”
Help your teen describe how they feel.
“You’ve mentioned feeling sad. On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being the saddest, how sad are you feeling right now?”.
Validate their experiences and emotions.
“Sounds like you are going through a tough time.”
Acknowledge that it can be difficult to share.
“Thank you for sharing, it can be difficult to talk about how we feel. It’s okay to take as much time as you need.”
Do not force your child to share.
“It’s okay if you do not want to talk about it now. I’ll be here for you when you are ready to share.”
Find out how your child would like to be supported.
“Is there anything I can do for you?”
Let them know that you care and will be there for them.
“I love you and I will be here to support you through it all.”
Through open discussions, our children may come to see us as a safe space in which they can share about their challenges. With a better understanding of what they are going through, we can then better support their wellbeing and get them the appropriate resources they need.
